May 30, 2009

Vinphy’s AnyTimeMoney? Laws:

1. An ATM is a thinking machine. It has an ego so Be Kind to it.

2. On cash-strapped days, one can see the neighborhood ATM grinning from side to side.

3. The bugs in the ATM s/w get activated at the same rate of urgency with which you need cash.

4.The amount of currency inside the ATM is inversely proportional to the amount needed.

5. The newly installed standby machines are just that – stand by.

6. The first time ATM users who are learning all the functions will almost always be before you.

7. An ATM has a soul and a karma and the money in it is an illusion.

8. God doesn’t need cash. All ATM’s are in hell.

9. The queue at the ATM is directly proportional to the urgency of cash needed.

10.‘God-damn-you!’ command to an ATM means that you want to gift your card to it.



P.S: These are my 'real life' experiences/ lessons. Please abide by them seriously.

30 comments:

BrownPhantom said...

Murphy seems to have a special fondness for you :).

muthu said...

ROFL vinnie... I loved the seventh statement...

:):)

cheers.

Amal Bose said...

i agree with 4 th and 9th ;-)
and lol at 8th..

Arv said...

thathuvoms... :)

kewl ones though... take care da... cheers...

kanagu said...

he he he... LOL vinnie... :) its really bad to hear everything happened to you :) seems to be god want to test your patience :)

Ire said...

The 5th and the 8th are classic and so true!

:)

gayathri vishwanathan said...

On cash-strapped days, one can see the neighborhood ATM grinning from side to side.


I agree with this one completely. Tu toh murphy se bhi badkar hain guru!

peter said...

11. The complexity of machines and the sensitivity of the screens are inversely proportional to ur knowledge and eagerness !

Useless Bugger said...

Aren't there any 'kind natured' ATM's ?

You know the ones who shell out unlimited money if you just said 'Pleeaasse?' in front of it.

Good one:-)I can see you've had quite a love-hate relationship with ATM's, Vin.

Prasant Naidu. said...

* u r nearest ATM is always out of order.
* u r office ATM is a dating point.
* and yes u would find at least one person blaring on his mobile as if Mr. Ambani has come down to take out cash and he is getting late.
These are my additions to the list of yours.
So true and well said.

Keep Rocking,
PN.

Anil Sawan said...

did any govt rep talk to you yet bout including ur laws in the next edition of 12th standard physics text?

~*wILd chILd*~ said...

LOL. thats so true.
I agree with 5th, 6th and 9th. :P

Archana said...

"10.‘God-damn-you!’ command to an ATM means that you want to gift your card to it."

Lol, how true! One time my ATM card literally was like sucked in alive by the ATM...so not cool! Cause you feel pretty helpless as it slides in and then decides that it's nice and cosy and has no plans of coming out.

Anonymous said...

It's quite some time since I last read scientific laws and boy! wasn't I in for a joy ride?:)

The ATM laws are witty and at the same time so true to life...file for an IPR soon!:)

Ashwathy said...

hehehe... i second u!! :D

Anonymous said...

some truths indeed regarding atms..
esp the queue part...

i have run out of cash now and i need some money.. hope there is no queue there

ApocalypsE said...

No:6!!!

They stand inside for like 15 mins... They walk out after what may seem like an end of an era, they come and ask you which way do I insert it...

Vinphy rocks... I think this will end up in school text books :D ...

MINATOR said...

the other day i went to the ATm, i dint have much balance, and i tried taking more than I had and the monitor gave me a finger... how mean... :(

Karthik said...

The amount of Currency inside ATM is directly proportional to the amount youngistan needed

The queue at the ATM is directly proportional to the sensual dance Nisha, Mallika together dancing!!

vinny said...

BrownPhantom
:) doesnt he? but WHY ??? grrrr!

Muthu
well...thanks but dont laugh too much..i am paying now:(

Amal
:) thank u saar!

Arv
:) thanks man

Kanagu
thanks da... i am the Chosen One!

vinny said...

Nikki
:) aint they?

Gayathri
hehhehehe...mine grins n if i look long, it sticks out a tongue too!

Peter
ah ha! always the case for me...thanks for ur contribution saar!

Parikshith
:) would love to know such ATM's..koi khabar nathi :(

vinny said...

Prasant
hhehee..bloody hell..so true!
thanks for this n i am now wondering which office u work at?

Sawan
hehhehehee...not yet!

Wild child
:) hehehehe...u bet!

Archana
ohh..that happened to u:) mean ATM's as if we dont care for our cards !

Calvy
well..joy ride at my expense :)
hehehe..i have to!
thanks for ur visit...

vinny said...

Ashwathy
thanks girl!

Chriz
i too hope the queue disappears before u!

Apocalypse
hahahhahhahha..what do u tell them?? insert it into ...???
LOLssss!
school text books...hmmmm

Minator
oh, mean they r :(

Karthik
hmmm...nisha..malika??? :)

gypsy said...

"The bugs in the ATM s/w get activated at the same rate of urgency with which you need cash."

LOl

that was a fun post...

Anonymous said...

5, 8, 10 ROFL... Too good :D

vinny said...

d gypsy
:) thanks...

kido
:) thanks kido..but u r 2 young to operate an ATM..so show this post to ur daddy, ok?

WritingsForLife said...

haha... this is awesome :-)
I have learned so many things like that too.
Cool blog :-)

vinny said...

Raaji
thank u! n thanks fr ur visit:)
all thanks to winnie!

raMmY said...

LOL all the way!!
so very true statements!!! especially "The queue at the ATM is directly proportional to the urgency of cash needed.".. Just when you need the booty, there is an infinite queue and each one seems to take an eternity to draw the cash out!! some ppl are just standing for a balance receipt!!! tats just enough to really piss u off!!!

hehe... well written!

cheers
rammy

vinny said...

Rammy
i guess we should pretend not to want any booty :)
thank u n thanks for the visit...

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